get up
squirt Infants Tylenol directly onto the crib mattress
squirt Infants Tylenol into Berry Baby’s mouth
return to bed
get up
prepare a quarter of a bottle of milk, slightly warmed, because Berry Baby is now a confirmed bottle addict who cannot, apparently, return to sleep without a bottle in his mouth, and requires his milk just on the warm side of room temperature
return to bed
doze off
repeat above
while attempting to fall asleep for the second time…
- contemplate purchasing stocks in Infants Tylenol since you are pretty sure you are solely responsible for their corporate success, based on the number of bottles that you go through in a short period of time…wonder if that would be considered insider trading…
- contemplate a bottle intervention when you realize that Berry Baby has consumed a total of 3 bottles since he was put to bed for the night…
- wonder where exactly you began to go wrong as a mother…
3 comments:
you will never have to be a mother for today again. repeat this out loud. Tomorrow may be another version of today, but optimistically it will be one less day in your life of parenting a grumpy, teething non-sleeping, bottle-addicted one year old.
(It will not feel like I'm helping if I remind you that you are so blessed and spoiled by our gracious Father with the gift of your precious smiley baby boy.) So I won't remind you.
well said, my friend. Well said.
Have to admit, even though I was tired and cranky today, he was still ridiculously cute. Monkey.
You can DO it!!!
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